top of page

Our Recent Posts

Archive

Tags

All Business Halloween Day Part 1: Rawhead Rex

Jordan Berry

Unfortunately, due to things like my summons to jury duty and the previously mentioned birthday outing to Dave and Buster’s, I was unable to get one movie for all 5 business days leading up to Halloween. Don’t fear though, you’re getting the remaining 3 over the course of today!

Released: 1987

Directed By: George Pavlou, but more notable for its screenplay by Clive Barker based on his short story of the same name.

Plot: Howard Hallenbeck (David Dukes) and his family are visiting a town in Ireland so that he can do research on buildings and items of religious significance. The church in town has a particularly weird stained glass window that shows a very creepy pagan god. Meanwhile some farmers are trying to move a big column of stone from the ground and while one eventually succeeds in moving it, he also succeeds in releasing said creepy pagan god. That pagan deity's name is Rawhead Rex (though he is referred to as Rawhead in the movie...only in one scene though...and the character shrieks it). What follows is pretty standard monster movie stuff, although there are some moments of absolute craziness that we can touch on in the next section.

Why To See It: This is not a very good movie. It’s not well made, Rawhead is...well Rawhead, and it is certainly not packed to the brim with good performances. Despite all of that, it still has a low budget charm and a bunch of unintentional laughs.

You may wonder why it is hard to really come to terms with the titular monster and that’s because he is not very scary. I don’t imagine anyone finding him all that scary, but presumably someone on the set thought so because he is in the movie A LOT. Most monster movies traditionally hide their antagonist away and only give you brief glimpses to fuel your imagination. Not Rawhead Rex, because they spent most of their budget on this guy and he is going to be front and center as often as possible. When he emerges from the ground near the beginning it is already a full reveal in broad daylight, effectively sucking any sense of wonder or mystery from the proceedings. Rawhead is also unable to close his mouth, and the actor inside him is limited in motion so his running is less menacing and more like a middle aged man who’s been struck by an incurable case of charlie horse. In some close ups you can hear his eyelids clicking as they open and close.

Enough about Rex's appearance, there is so much more to delve into here. Maybe it would be most helpful to describe the first kill sequence. Rawhead is hanging out in a shed he has broken into (as pagan gods are wont to do) and the owners of the shed notice the door ajar. The husband goes out and is dispatched quickly, but his pregnant wife, that’s another story. Once she realizes what is happening and sees Rawhead she launches into what can only be described as “the pregnant lurch.” She’s contorting her face and yelling and swinging about as if she’s been stricken with a sudden case of Crazy Face Flail Syndrome (find it under CFFS in your medical reference books) as she open palm shuffles her way through the house. She finally gets to her room upstairs (the syndrome makes you move slow), locks the door, and then immediately stands very close to said door to see if Rex is there. Rex, by the way, is downstairs having a gay old time messing up the kitchen utilizing such horrifying actions as breaking eggs and flipping tables. Just in case you think kitchen destruction is stupid, the director drives home the sense of casualties with a close up of a spaghetti box with the strands leaking out. Rex is a sick bastard man.

That all happens towards the start of the film. Further along we get the Hallenbecks giving each other perhaps the grossest on screen kiss in history, which is immediately followed by the line “You’ve never kissed me like that before” as a woman in a red raincoat creeps in from the side. Further than that we are treated to a cop whose face is locked in a hilarious permanent scowl. Further than THAT it actually gets crazy. Plus there is a Priest who is kind of a hard ass who goes crazy when he touches the altar. Have I mentioned that the villain looks like absolute garbage? I have? Good! Because he does. He looks like such garbage.

Scare Factor: Non-existent.

Recommended?: This is a VERY light no for me. If you like bad/guilty pleasure horror movies then this is for you, assuming you’ve already seen Trolls 2, Sleepaway Camp, and Pieces. Its nowhere near as essential as those, but it's got some great stuff in it. You can also watch this if you are a Barker completist. If you aren’t you can go watch Hellraiser, its much better in every way. I still have a place in my heart for Rawhead Rex though.

bottom of page